Erotic Poetry

I don’t say this very often but, today I really am sick of writing. I’ve been helping my Man finish off the last bits of his essays for university, he knows what he’s talking about but, sometimes I’m better at spinning things out and making it sound cleverer than it actually is so, that’s what I’ve been doing today. I don’t often get truly fed-up with writing, writing this isn’t a hardship but, I’m sorry to say I’m not wholly in the mood for it today. However, I am just about to delve into some reading – another thing I very rarely get sick of. I fear I won’t be reading for long before my eyes weld themselves shut so, I shall make the most out of the probably 15-20 minutes that I have.

Despite the fact that I’m not feeling it with the writing today, I wanted to post a quick blog about reading – in particular, poetry.

As most of you know, my forte when it comes to writing is erotica or romance whether that be fact or fiction, advice or stories. I’ve only ever written one erotic poem but, as a reader I’m a huge fan of it. Especially poetry which isn’t specifically supposed to be erotic and yet, to me, it completely is. For example, E.E Cummings is known for his essays, poems and plays, however, despite the romantic and sometimes erotic nature of his poetry, nobody would call him an erotica writer or romanticist. Anyway, tonight I’m in the mood for some E.E.Cummings as you might have guessed, I shall start with my favourite – my favourite Cummings and one of my favourite poems.

I’ll post the poem below for any who haven’t read it or indeed for those who have and just want to take another look. I hope you enjoy it and remember that all the credit goes to the wonderful E.E Cummings. I keep meaning to buy an anthology due to the amount of wonderful poems he has created – Humanity I Love You, If, I Have Found What You Are Like. I’ll get around to it one day, in the meantime, here’s I Like My Body When It Is With Your Body. Of all of E.E Cummings’ poems I find this one the most erotic, it definitely reminds me of making love, with the attention to nerves and kissing, firm smoothness and stroking. It’s sexy but subtle, sultry and romantic. Read it, and let it fill you up, let the words wash over you and remind you of a particular encounter or special moment you had.

i like my body when it is with your
body. It is so quite new a thing.
Muscles better and nerves more.
i like your body.  i like what it does,
i like its hows.  i like to feel the spine
of your body and its bones,and the trembling
-firm-smooth ness and which i will
again and again and again
kiss, i like kissing this and that of you,
i like, slowly stroking the,shocking fuzz
of your electric furr,and what-is-it comes
over parting flesh….And eyes big love-crumbs,

and possibly i like the thrill

of under me you so quite new.

14 Sex Tips She Wants YOU To Know

After seeing a few articles pop up on my Facebook news feed this weekend about ‘how to please your woman’, ‘what women really want in bed’, ‘how to give her the best sex ever’ etc. I got sick of seeing these crappy little articles and decided to write one myself instead! I’m not saying all the articles above were written by egotistical men – some were written by women which is surprising.

Anyway, here’s my 14 tips, things that your woman really wants you to know but doesn’t want to tell you – usually in order to save your ego and ahem, manhood from taking a whacking.

So ladies, if you’re reading this, take a look and then show this article to your man – don’t be shy! And men, take a long, hard look, take it all in and go and make me proud. And remember folks, not everybody is the same, these are more like guidelines than actual rules 😉

Kiss her neck

In a world where more and more men are taking their lead from pornography when it comes to sex, kissing, nibbling and licking her neck is intimate and will drive her wild. And it’s not just the neck, her collarbone, shoulders and decolletage are all highly sensitive areas – don’t forget them!

She’s all ears

While you’re there kissing at the nape of her neck, teasing her hair follicles, stroking her collarbone etc, don’t forget her ears. Inside and out the ears are packed with super sensitive nerve endings, gently nibble, lick and breath softly around her ear, massage her ear lobe with your lips and whisper to her. Tell her what she’s doing to you, how beautiful and sexy she is, that you want to make love to her, tell her what you’re doing to her on the outside and what she’s doing to you on the inside. We love to hear it.

Tease her tresses

Gently tugging at her hair stimulates nerve endings. If you or she is into it, try burying your whole hand in her hair and tugging a little harder, slowly move her head to where you want it, let her know you want to be in control. In a recent study, research showed that couples who ‘groom’ – give massages, brush and play with each other’s hair etc, had a deeper and more satisfying bond.

Eye contact

Lustful stares when done right are highly erotic but, for a woman, holding eye contact during love making can heighten the intimacy like you wouldn’t believe. Some people may prefer positions where you can’t maintain eye contact – in this case, a well-placed mirror can be a huge turn on and mean you can keep looking at each other.

Watch me

Both sexes are turned on more by sight than by any other sense. Watching each other can increase intimacy tenfold, whether it’s her watching you or you watching her, you could be pleasuring each other or yourselves it doesn’t matter.

Out of your mind

Make her feel like you’re totally lost in her and you cannot get enough of her. Women who are emotionally satisfied during sex are far more likely to say that the sex was very pleasurable. Her biggest sexual organ is her mind and the idea of being devoured because she’s a powerful and sexual Goddess will arouse the hell out of it.

There’s more to her breasts than just the nipples

Don’t get me wrong, we love you suckling and nibbling on them but, there’s a lot more to it than that. Breasts are a great way to tease her, the nipple is the most sensitive part of course but, run the tips of your fingers around the whole of her breast cup them and swirl around the edge of the areolas with your tongue then finally slip the tip of her nipple into your mouth and nibble. It’s not a contest to see how much of her breast you can get into her mouth.

Don’t forget the butt..

Gently cupping or squeezing her ass during sex invites her to move her hips, be directional but don’t grab. Also, don’t grab onto her buns and hold on for dear life, stroke and knead her softly, stimulating her muscles and soft skin.

Touchy feely

During the day or out in public, gently touching or squeezing her ass can be sexy and cute, it reminds her that you’re thinking of her in a naughty way but, other more subtle touches and caresses can be very sexy too, for example, the inside of her wrist or her knee if she’s sitting down or her waist or elbow if she’s standing. These areas are more intimate but sexy and it feels more seductive and secretly naughty.

Head to toe

So you started at the neck and worked your way down but don’t just stop at her vagina. Okay so some women (and some men) may just want to stay away from feet altogether, however, they can be a huge turn on for her. Foot massages, little kisses and nibbles are all winners. Focus your attention on the arch of her foot – just below the ankle on the inside of her leg, the skin in thin here and extremely sensual. Don’t forget her legs either, kissing all the way down, past her pussy and then back up again is torturous for us but, a definite turn on. No tickling though!

Make her wet

You’re not checking your oil levels in your car, just because she feels wet enough to your fingers on the outside, doesn’t mean that’s the case inside. There’s still plenty of arousal to be had and it gives her more time to tune into being fully sensual, which can make her orgasm much more intense.

Rough but gentle

Warm her up first and a woman’s pain threshold increases tenfold. Be aggressive in your delivery but sensitive to her needs. Sometimes we desperately want you to take charge. Pin her down on the bed, push her against the door or wall, gently tease your hand around her neck, hold her hands down above her head. Communication is key, make sure she doesn’t resist and get to know what you both like gradually.

Catch her out – be spontaneous

When it’s either in the morning or last thing at night, sex can start to feel a bit routine so, sometimes you have to shake things up a little. Be spontaneous, remember it will take her longer to get into the mood than you but, one of the best ways to get her there is by showing her how sexy you find her. Kiss her like you can’t contain yourself. For example, if she’s been for a shower, kiss and lick the water at her neck, touch the outsides of her hips and thighs – after a shower her skin will be warm and soft and extra sensitive.

Remember…

Probably the most important rule, I’ve touched on it (no pun intended I promise!) in the other points but, I wanted to highlight it. Men’s sexuality and arousal can be thought of like a light switch. Obviously they have their moments when they just aren’t in the mood but when they are, it hasn’t taken them long to get there. For women, it’s completely the opposite, sometimes our thoughts and your unplanned actions have the right effects and we help ourselves, other times you have to work for it. Worship her body, talk to her, massage her, make her feel relaxed and beautiful, hint with subtle glances and caresses beforehand and take your time. If she feels rushed, it’s just not happening for her.

Like I said at the beginning, this isn’t a rule book to follow, you can’t just follow down the list and tick each one as you go. Everybody is different, as it every situation but, give some of my pointers a whirl sometime, you never know!

Phone Sex – A Beginners Guide

No, I don’t mean the paid-for, chat-line phone sex. That’s just cold and impersonal, there’s no thought or intimacy behind it at all. I mean two lovers, who know each other’s real names and passions. The act of having sex over the phone with somebody can be both maddeningly frustrating and equally arousing.

With only sound as feedback, one needs to tell more, describe fully, and be ultra-clear about progress. Codes will develop that signal shifts of mood or movement; rises of volume or breathing pace when speeding up, slowing down, starting to come; favoured words and phrases that trigger memories or fantasies. Create a scenario; take it in turns to tell a story; ask intimate questions and answer them; make a confession of lust or love. For her in particular, fingers, vibrators and sound will likely do it all; if he hankers for visuals too, get her to do it in front of a mirror and describe herself.

Once supremely in sync, slide into control games, there is a special arousal in being directed long-distance – the other’s voice alone telling one to “stop…start…pause” while one fights the temptation to tip over the edge. And there is a special pleasure in knowing that your lover is being aroused solely by your direction and is doing precisely what you instruct. If in charge, keep yourself simmering too, so that when the other is on the edge, you can first give them permission (to “come now”) and then immediately join them in climax.

Below are 5 golden rules to follow when it comes to phone sex. I haven’t written them in any particular order since each one is as important as the next. Use them together. Take them as advice and go from there.

Number 1 – Feelings.

In the same way that erotica writers write about feelings and reactions and not just actions, couples who want to get the most out of carnal relations over the phone, need to make sure they use their words to describe how they feel – how the conversation is making them feel or how your partner is making you feel. This could be by prompting them to remember a particularly enjoyable and ahem, intimate moment you have recently shared or you could just be generic and say things like ‘you always know just how I like it..’

Alternatively, you could just describe to your partner what you’re doing to yourself and how that is making you feel. Tell them how being on the phone with them and sharing this experience with them, makes you feel. You don’t have to go straight into X-rated chat. In fact you don’t have to talk like that to each other at all if you don’t want to. You can just talk to each other how you would normally. Saying something like ‘I wish you were lying next to me right now’ in a certain voice, at a certain moment can swing the conversation around from ordinary to intimate and sexy.

Phone sex is about using the act of describing feelings and emotions you experience with your partner when you’re getting intimate. It’s about re-creating that atmosphere you create when you are together. You have to create a story, a fantasy, that surrounds you both and lets you see past the distance that separates you and get lost in your collective thoughts.

Number 2 – Any Questions?

Unless it’s arranged beforehand, phone sex is spontaneous and leads on from an ordinary conversation. A simple sound or word can turn a pleasant chat or a tentative exchange, into something a whole lot more sensual. Questions play a vital role in phone sex. They allow you to lead each other by asking direct and specific things in order to gain responses. For example, ask her what’s she’s wearing, whatever she replies you can say how you would love to peel those clothes off of her. Ask him if he misses your touch and tell him how much you miss how he tastes.

In life, questions act as prompts. You ask somebody a question and they give you an answer. This is why they are so important when it comes to phone sex, because you can use them to lead the conversation to where you want it to go. By asking questions and giving answers, phone sex can make you a better lover because it teaches you both how to give direction and how to receive it.

Number 3 – Guidance.

Statistically, women have more trouble throwing away their inhibitions and getting stuck into talking dirty without any tentativeness or shyness in sight. However, there are exceptions to every rule and statistics are there to be challenged. Whether male or female, if phone sex is something new or different to somebody, it’s important to make them feel as relaxed and comfortable as possible so they can enjoy the experience properly.

If your partner seems hesitant, try to guide their actions. Give them gentle but firm instructions. Talk them through undressing themselves. Tell your partner how to remove their clothes and when. Guide their hands with your words. Tell them where to caress and get them to describe how it feels. When you verbally take control of the situation, it makes things less awkward and gives a certain structure to the fun. You can make the whole act play out like a story or a scene in a movie. Beginning, middle and end.

Number 4 – Fantasies.

Even if beginners are tentative at first, it’s important to remember that phone sex typically allows participants to feel less inhibited than if they were together in person. People feel freer on the phone because they’re just talking about their desires and needs rather than actually doing them. Phone sex can be the perfect way to introduce to your partner something you want to try out in the bedroom. You can hedge your bets and see how they respond to your particular fantasy. If there’s something you’ve been dying to try, the explicit thrill of phone sex will keep you both horny as hell even with the distance between you.

We’re different people when we’re aroused. Some of us have fantasies we’d never dream of acting out, however; this doesn’t make the fantasy any less real in our heads or any less of a turn on. Most of the time, fantasies are there because we may never be able to fulfil them, they are hardly ever there to be made into reality. However, phone sex is words, not actions. Yes, it’s an intimate connection between two people who know each others’ minds and bodies but it’s also an invaluable opportunity to communicate sexually with each other, without being able to act on your words straight away.

Number 5 – Communication

People use phones for communication. Phone sex should be no different. It doesn’t work unless there’s a fair exchange of information, it should be two way. You could have one person doing most of the talking, doesn’t mean the other person is silent. Sometimes, we underestimate how sexy heavy breathing, a small moan or a long guttural growl can be. This holds especially true for those who are quite vocal in the bedroom. If she screams and moans in the bedroom, she’s likely to enjoy the same thing over the phone so she’ll appreciate all the more, the smaller grunts and groans you make.

However, going back to what I said about there being less barriers and less shyness over the phone than in person, those who tend to be quieter or stay away from dirty talk, might find it easier communicate in this way when they can’t see their partner. Don’t be afraid to sound cliched – it’s true that asking her what she wearing can be really un-sexy just because of the fact it’s such a stereotype, but if you’re aroused by it then why not?

In conclusion then, there might be differences in how your partner behaves and interacts with you over the phone compared to when you’re in person. However, when you and your partner are just starting out, it’s vital that you get to know what they enjoy sex-wise. You need to learn all of their likes and dislikes find all of their buttons and how to push them. Phone sex is no different. You have to discover what they enjoy and what they want from the conversation and the same goes for you as well.

Phone sex is a fantastic way to reach out and touch somebody when you can’t actually feel their skin pressed up against yours. Let the words flow and let your hands wander and remember that phone sex doesn’t only require a good connection with your signal provider; it requires a fantastic connection with your partner too.

The Most Popular Fetishes – What Really Makes you Tick?

Some people think they don’t have a fetish, and some of those people are right. While others are sure of their fetish and yet think they are abnormal because of it. So, for starters let’s clear the air about what a fetish is.

If you have a fetish, you are obsessively fixated on either an object or a body part.

You need that specific something for sexual gratification. You fantasize about that particular thing, whether you’re alone or with a partner. You need to think about that object or have it present in order to be satisfied.

For example, if you’re attracted to women with red hear, that’s fine, however, if you are unable to get aroused unless you’re with a red headed woman or fantasize about one, then you probably have a fetish for red heads.

Types of fetishes

Fetishes come in three different varieties. There are many varied and diverse fetishes, but all of them can be sorted into one of these three categories; media, form and animate.

A media fetish is when the obsession is based on a material. This includes leather, latex and silk. Form fetishes include stiletto heels, knee-high boots and lingerie; this is where it’s the shape of the object that has great significance.

Feet, hair, breasts and all that good stuff are also considered fetishes but because they are human objects they’re called animate fetishes.

Anybody can turn anything into a fetish. There are also varying degrees of a fetish – from mild to extreme. The following is a list of eight fetishes I have compiled from internet research.

They are in no particular order but I have found them to be the most popular out of all the ones I have researched. There are plenty of others I didn’t include; some tamer and some a hundred times more wild.

Number 1

So let’s start with body piercings. This one is very popular amongst the younger generations. Everything from bellybuttons, tongues, nipples, eyebrows and ears, there are so many who love this and for the specific few, it’s even a prerequisite.

Some people just enjoy the sight of piercings, whereas others enjoy the feel, taste or texture of them. They vary from small, large, intricate and simple depending on what part of the body they are attached to and can be very tactile objects for some people.

It’s all about preference. Certain people hate piercings – they perceive them as something that mars something pure and natural, to others they are sexy and irresistible.

Number 2

Men love material. They like to touch and tug at clothes just as much as they like to watch a woman dressing and undressing. In particular, men enjoy watching a woman move around in anything tight, reflective or shiny. Even though they may settle down with a woman who is ‘vanilla’, most men are always fantasizing about the classic bad girl look.

For women it’s more about the feel of the material. Although, I don’t know any woman who isn’t affected by a delicious man in a leather jacket… It depends how far you want to delve into the world of BDSM but generally speaking latex and vinyl are associated with mistresses and dominants.

Number 3

Next up, feet. You can’t tell me you didn’t see this one coming. Men love to lick, suck, kiss and bite women’s feet. Some men find it impossible to date a woman who has unattractive feet. I’ll be fair to the minority and say that for some men, feet are not in the least bit arousing. However, to the vast majority great sexual pleasure cause be found from playing with womens feet.

In comparison, women are not too fussed about feet and find greater pleasure from stimulating men’s fingers and hands. Hand fetishism usually includes an attraction to a specific area such as fingers, palm or nails.

Number 4

This next fetish is linked very closely with Number 2. Domination and submission is an incredibly popular fetish amongst all ages and genders. It has to be said that most women dominate, whilst most men submit. While women enjoy bossing their man around in bed, spanking them and shouting at them, men find it arousing and relaxing to submit to their woman – especially if they are in a position of power as part of their day-to-day routine or a high-powered career.

Of course, it’s not uncommon for a woman to submit to her man. Some women find it incredibly arousing to have no control in the bedroom – this is especially common with women who ‘run’ their household.

Domination and submission is a very varied practice. It can range from the odd spank here and there to whipping, caning and other debauchery. This is the most appealing part of BDSM because every person/couple can put his or her mark on it (no pun intended…honest!) and enjoy it in their own way.

Number 5

It surely won’t surprise you that hair has made its way into this list of popular fetishes. Amongst men, hair in particular shapes and colours is a big turn on whereas for women, facial hair is the main focus. Whether it is blond, brunette, red, long, short, curly, straight, braids, ponytails, you name it and a man out there will have a fetish for it.

Men enjoy a womans hair for 2 reasons in particular. Firstly, pigtails and ponytails emanate a youthfulness that certain men find erotic and secondly men enjoy something other than skin to hang on to. Most pheromones come from the top of your head, which means your hair is drenched in them, long hair grabs onto these pheromones and in turn, this attracts men – without them or you even realising!

It can be arousing and fun at the same time for both parties digging your fingers into each other’s hair, the scent and the texture is arousing to most men (and women). Hair is incredibly strong and resilient – especially if looked after well, so it can be tugged, pulled and tied to your heart’s content.

For women the appeal lies not just in hair but facial hair in particular. A man with a beard, moustache or even the slightest bit of stubble just radiates testosterone and masculinity that cannot be replicated in any other way. Women find it a joy to stroke, nuzzle and simply look at facial hair on a man.

Number 6

Voyeurism and exhibitionism are very popular fetishes, either when with a partner or flying solo. Technically, voyeurism is when the person/people being watched are unaware they have an audience. However, as a fetish voyeurism is typically consensual, which means all those involved have consented to being watched.

Examples of voyeuristic behaviours could include watching a partner undress or masturbate, watching an internet “live” cam or observing people at a nude beach. Exhibitionism is the other side of the story – those who love to put on a show and receive their thrills from the knowledge they are being watched.

Number 7

Believe it or not, water and its many variants are hugely popular with both men and women. Many find they enjoy sex more when they can hear, feel or taste running water from a range of different sources, including the rain or a shower.

However, it’s not always just about water. This fetish can stretch to steam and ice and all the wonderful things you can do with them. Others find there thrill from thunderstorms, listening to the powerful sounds and the sudden flashes of light, creates a sense of empowerment and gives a thrill like no other.

Aquaphilia or Hydrophilia is a fetish that involves being underwater or immersed in water (swimming or bathing), it is not all that common as a fetish but many couples have partaken in sexual activity whilst swimming or bathing.

Number 8

Aphrodisiacs are elements that evoke or stimulate sexual desire. There are drugs that claim to enhance your sex life and they are often mislabelled as aphrodisiacs. However, in order to be a true aphrodisiac they have to create desire – not improve ability and performance.

Aphrodisiacs can work in two ways; there are those that create sexual desire by working on the mind and there are those that create desire by affecting certain parts of the body. For example, something that increases the blood flow can have the effect of creating desire. Likewise, there are products that can make our bodies increase production of certain chemicals associated with sexual desire.

Everybody knows that chocolate has always been associated with love and romance. It contains the ‘feel good’ chemical serotonin which is produced by the brain and released when we are feeling happy or passionate.

There are a range of other foods both sweet and savoury that are believed to be aphrodisiacs, including garlic, chilli peppers, honey, oysters and liquorice.

As well as aphrodisiacs, food can also be used for food play or sitophilia, which is when those involved are aroused by erotic situations with food. Whether it’s adding something tasty to a person’s skin and then cleaning it off or feeding somebody erotic food as part of foreplay, sitophilia is popular the world over.

So that’s it for my little list of fetishes, I hope you have fun exploring some of them and enjoyed my research! Don’t forget there are of course many many more than the ones I have chosen to list, and also don’t forget that exploring these fetishes depends on your partner – exploring your desires together and with mutual curiosity will make them all the more fun.